- To become even more self-sufficient. I like growing my own veggies, but I wish I had space to raise cattle for beef. And pigs. And maybe a goat for milk, if I could just milk her in the morning. I want to make my own soaps, herbal remedies, and cleaning supplies.
- To finish our house. I'm sick unto death of living in a construction zone. I'm sick of our ugly bathroom and kitchen. And if the dining room had plaster walls and a pine floor instead of paneling and pergo, I think I'd swoon.
- To be comfortable financially. I don't need much, really. I lived in my first apartment on $800 a month, and the rent was $400. I can be frugal, and I'm a homebody. But our car will eventually need to be replaced, and things go wrong. So "comfortable" means having enough to save a bit every month.
- To homeschool my kids. I'm not sure how long I want to do this for, but I already hate the idea of sending Ethan off to kindergarten. I hate how education has become so centered on standardized testing that it's more a matter of how much you can memorize instead of how much you actually learn. I'm also not too keen on exposing him to all of the sex/drugs/profanity that it seems like even the littlest kids now know about. I was sheltered, with the added bonus that I was completely oblivious to pop culture. I didn't have a clue what all the other kids were talking about, and I didn't care. I was perfectly happy to read my books about magic and dragons and ignore the world. But I'm not sure that is completely normal, and I don't expect my kids to be the same way. So, I want to give them a good foundation at home before allowing the rest of the world in. I also want them to have the freedom to explore topics in greater depth than what happens in most schools, to really learn about topics instead of just skimming over them.
- To buy a house and land further away from town. I want to have room to roam away from pavement, cars, and other people. We've toyed with the idea of building our own home, possibly from strawbales, and I think that would be the ultimate accomplishment.
- To stay home from work to raise my kids. I'm fortunate enough to have family who can watch Ethan, so I don't worry about leaving him. And I have a job that I love. But I don't want to do this forever. Being home feels like something I'm being called to do.
- To have another child, so that the "kids" and "children" I've mentioned in the past two posts are real instead of imagined.
- To take an exotic vacation. Just one would be fine. I'm happy going to the Smoky Mountains and to Sleeping Bear Dunes for vacation. But I think it would be awesome to go to Scotland. Or Italy. Or Egypt.
Showing posts with label dreams. Show all posts
Showing posts with label dreams. Show all posts
10/24/2011
What I Want
In no particular order...
Our life, in a nutshell
If you've been reading this blog for any length of time, you will know that I have lots of ideas that often pull me in different directions. We are still trying to sort out the specifics, but our ultimate goal has always been to live a more healthy, sustainable, self-sufficient lifestyle. Secondary has been to fix up our house. We vacillate between staying here and moving. We also talk often about whether or not I will continue to work full-time.
I know a lot of this has been gone over before in previous posts, but I need to clear my head, and writing is usually the best way for me to do it. Bear with me.
I still feel very strongly that our country is headed for disaster. I don't mean this in a conspiracy-theory kind of way; I just mean that we (as a country) have had our priorities jacked up for about as long as is sustainable. Our goal has been progress. Progress at any cost, and progress for its own sake. As machines and computers started to do the work of people, it was thought that people would work less and have more time for leisure. The opposite has been true. We work more. We spend less time as a family. We value entertainment over relationships. We value convenience over authenticity. Newer, Better, and Faster have become the gods that America worships, and we serve them at an extremely high cost to ourselves and our future.
And I DO NOT want this for myself or my family. In many ways, we have opted out.
Our only television lives in the basement. I will not raise a child who is a mindless consumer. We avoid toys and clothing that are feature popular characters. He has no idea who Dora and Diego are, has never seen Blue of Blue's Clues, and identifies Cars characters by the type of vehicle they are instead of by name. I intend on keeping it this way for as long as possible, as I feel very strongly that kids are exposed to too much advertising too early. Mommy and Daddy should be the central figures and examples in the lives of our children, not characters. Too many people rely on "educational" television to teach their children. Shayne and I will rely on ourselves. We strive to set an example of behavior for our children to mimic, instead of telling them to do as we say and not as we do. We are our children's best teachers, and as a result, we are becoming better people. We are far from perfect, but it's important for our kids to see that too. We make mistakes. We are human. But we can always strive to be better.
We spend lots of time outside. Ethan has never once become bored or cranky outside. It's the ultimate entertainment, and it moves at the speed of the child. All it takes is a parent or caretaker willing to supervise instead of getting something done. It's not realistic to spend all day, every day outside. Meals still need to be cooked, showers need to be taken, and the laundry doesn't put itself away. But it's been an important lesson for me to organize my time around my little guy's need to play and explore - not the other way around. Babies accommodate the parent's routine. Toddlers need accommodation, otherwise they become cranky and confused. Having a loosely structured day, with the child's needs foremost, make for a much happier home. Please don't confuse this with accommodating a toddler's every want and whim. There is a difference. Children need to play. They also need boundaries. They do not need to be allowed to tyrannize their parents.
We grow and raise some of our own food - more every year. And we are working on cooking more and more from scratch. In addition to being healthier for us than conventionally grown food, our organically frown veggies are healthier for the earth. And the less food that is shipped across the country, the lower our country's gas consumption. We also have the peace of mind from knowing our eggs were laid by happy, free-ranging hens, that our home-canned food is additive free, and that we are raising our child to think about where his food comes from.
We live within our means. We could afford a larger house, with a larger payment. We could afford a new car. We could afford to take a cruise. Well, none of this right now, since I was paycheck-less for a while and our house and car both decided to fall apart at the same time we had big vet bills for our poor old kitty, but our household income is higher than that of the average American family. But we don't live like the average American family. We choose to save money in our own retirement fund instead of relying on Social Security or pensions from our jobs.
We try to live small. Less stuff means less to clean, less to take care of, and less to weigh us down. It's a work in progress, and we aren't true minimalists or ascetics. We just try not to have anything that isn't useful, beautiful, or that we don't love. It's hard. Especially with the constant bombardment of media and internet images. Even though I have all the ads blocked on my browser, I still visit blogs and message boards, and I see houses and property that I wish I had. I have to constantly remind myself that we are where we are supposed to be right now, and there is always a lot behind the pictures that I don't know. Maybe the people are swimming in debt. Maybe they received an inheritance. Maybe they scrimped and saved every penny for many, many years to be where they are. There are so many variables that it's an exercise in futility to try to compare yourself to anyone else.
These are the main tenants of our existence right now... But where are we going?
And the truth is, I don't know.
I'm trying so very hard to figure that out right now, but I'm not making any realistic headway. I just feel pulled in six different directions... Over the next few days, maybe weeks, I'll be trying to work through my options and feelings. Stay tuned...
I know a lot of this has been gone over before in previous posts, but I need to clear my head, and writing is usually the best way for me to do it. Bear with me.
I still feel very strongly that our country is headed for disaster. I don't mean this in a conspiracy-theory kind of way; I just mean that we (as a country) have had our priorities jacked up for about as long as is sustainable. Our goal has been progress. Progress at any cost, and progress for its own sake. As machines and computers started to do the work of people, it was thought that people would work less and have more time for leisure. The opposite has been true. We work more. We spend less time as a family. We value entertainment over relationships. We value convenience over authenticity. Newer, Better, and Faster have become the gods that America worships, and we serve them at an extremely high cost to ourselves and our future.
And I DO NOT want this for myself or my family. In many ways, we have opted out.
Our only television lives in the basement. I will not raise a child who is a mindless consumer. We avoid toys and clothing that are feature popular characters. He has no idea who Dora and Diego are, has never seen Blue of Blue's Clues, and identifies Cars characters by the type of vehicle they are instead of by name. I intend on keeping it this way for as long as possible, as I feel very strongly that kids are exposed to too much advertising too early. Mommy and Daddy should be the central figures and examples in the lives of our children, not characters. Too many people rely on "educational" television to teach their children. Shayne and I will rely on ourselves. We strive to set an example of behavior for our children to mimic, instead of telling them to do as we say and not as we do. We are our children's best teachers, and as a result, we are becoming better people. We are far from perfect, but it's important for our kids to see that too. We make mistakes. We are human. But we can always strive to be better.
We spend lots of time outside. Ethan has never once become bored or cranky outside. It's the ultimate entertainment, and it moves at the speed of the child. All it takes is a parent or caretaker willing to supervise instead of getting something done. It's not realistic to spend all day, every day outside. Meals still need to be cooked, showers need to be taken, and the laundry doesn't put itself away. But it's been an important lesson for me to organize my time around my little guy's need to play and explore - not the other way around. Babies accommodate the parent's routine. Toddlers need accommodation, otherwise they become cranky and confused. Having a loosely structured day, with the child's needs foremost, make for a much happier home. Please don't confuse this with accommodating a toddler's every want and whim. There is a difference. Children need to play. They also need boundaries. They do not need to be allowed to tyrannize their parents.
We grow and raise some of our own food - more every year. And we are working on cooking more and more from scratch. In addition to being healthier for us than conventionally grown food, our organically frown veggies are healthier for the earth. And the less food that is shipped across the country, the lower our country's gas consumption. We also have the peace of mind from knowing our eggs were laid by happy, free-ranging hens, that our home-canned food is additive free, and that we are raising our child to think about where his food comes from.
We live within our means. We could afford a larger house, with a larger payment. We could afford a new car. We could afford to take a cruise. Well, none of this right now, since I was paycheck-less for a while and our house and car both decided to fall apart at the same time we had big vet bills for our poor old kitty, but our household income is higher than that of the average American family. But we don't live like the average American family. We choose to save money in our own retirement fund instead of relying on Social Security or pensions from our jobs.
We try to live small. Less stuff means less to clean, less to take care of, and less to weigh us down. It's a work in progress, and we aren't true minimalists or ascetics. We just try not to have anything that isn't useful, beautiful, or that we don't love. It's hard. Especially with the constant bombardment of media and internet images. Even though I have all the ads blocked on my browser, I still visit blogs and message boards, and I see houses and property that I wish I had. I have to constantly remind myself that we are where we are supposed to be right now, and there is always a lot behind the pictures that I don't know. Maybe the people are swimming in debt. Maybe they received an inheritance. Maybe they scrimped and saved every penny for many, many years to be where they are. There are so many variables that it's an exercise in futility to try to compare yourself to anyone else.
These are the main tenants of our existence right now... But where are we going?
And the truth is, I don't know.
I'm trying so very hard to figure that out right now, but I'm not making any realistic headway. I just feel pulled in six different directions... Over the next few days, maybe weeks, I'll be trying to work through my options and feelings. Stay tuned...
10/08/2010
The Dream
While I am much, MUCH happier with our house and property now than I was a year ago, I still have this dream of buying a house in the middle of nowhere. We've been trying like crazy to simplify our lives, both physically in terms of excess possessions, as well as spiritually/emotionally. It's harder than I expected. Between work, family obligations, and my personal desires, I often feel like I'm being torn in two or three directions. And our "stuff"... We already have less than many people I know, but we still have some clutter and junk that we don't need or use. It's a work in progress. Thankfully, the living spaces of our home are pretty clutter free (excepting the kitchen, which seems to collect crap like nowhere else), and they feel much more serene as a result.
But the embodiment of the simplicity dream, for me, is a cabin in the woods. On vacations Up North as a child, we almost always stayed in vintage cottages - places with more charm than convenience. There was one that had a makeshift bathroom on the screened-in back porch. There was a tub on one side, a sink and toilet on the other, and the main entrance to the cabin ran right down the middle. Another place didn't even have a tub. Or a shower. We bathed in the lake every time we stayed there. We lived through rickety beds, mismatched furnishings that wouldn't fetch a dime at the Salvation Army store,and cranky vintage appliances for a week or two every summer. And I loved it.
So when I was perusing the real estate ads (bad idea, I know) and found an "Up North Cottage" for sale right in the area where Shayne and I hope to someday move... I fell in love. Hard.
It's small, about 800 square feet including an addition, but it has more than enough personality to make up for it's size. There's a fireplace, knotty pine paneled walls, hardwood floors, a vintage kitchen with drainboard sink, and 20 acres of meadows and woods surrounding it. It's the closest I could ever get to Up North here in Indiana.
It was on the market forever. And then one day, when I checked the ads for the first time in a while, it was gone. I mulled it over for a few weeks, then decided to call the realtor to see if it had sold or just went off the market for a while.
Nobody's bought it yet; the seller is just taking a break.
Maybe there's still hope.
But the embodiment of the simplicity dream, for me, is a cabin in the woods. On vacations Up North as a child, we almost always stayed in vintage cottages - places with more charm than convenience. There was one that had a makeshift bathroom on the screened-in back porch. There was a tub on one side, a sink and toilet on the other, and the main entrance to the cabin ran right down the middle. Another place didn't even have a tub. Or a shower. We bathed in the lake every time we stayed there. We lived through rickety beds, mismatched furnishings that wouldn't fetch a dime at the Salvation Army store,and cranky vintage appliances for a week or two every summer. And I loved it.
So when I was perusing the real estate ads (bad idea, I know) and found an "Up North Cottage" for sale right in the area where Shayne and I hope to someday move... I fell in love. Hard.
It's small, about 800 square feet including an addition, but it has more than enough personality to make up for it's size. There's a fireplace, knotty pine paneled walls, hardwood floors, a vintage kitchen with drainboard sink, and 20 acres of meadows and woods surrounding it. It's the closest I could ever get to Up North here in Indiana.
It was on the market forever. And then one day, when I checked the ads for the first time in a while, it was gone. I mulled it over for a few weeks, then decided to call the realtor to see if it had sold or just went off the market for a while.
Nobody's bought it yet; the seller is just taking a break.
Maybe there's still hope.
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